Marriage, Covenant, and the God Who Provides
Genesis 24 gives us one of Scripture’s richest pictures of God’s providence, covenant love, and the foundations of marriage. Abraham sends his servant on a 1,500‑kilometre journey to find a wife for Isaac, insisting, “The Lord… will send his angel before you” (vv. 7–8). The servant prays, Rebecca appears, and God’s kindness unfolds step by step. Derek’s sermon draws out five themes: the deliberate care required in preparing for marriage, the uniqueness of marriage as a covenant, the stark contrast between marriage and sin, the glory of marriage as a reflection of Christ and the Church, and the hope of forgiveness and renewal through the cross. With honesty and pastoral clarity, he shows that marriage is not merely cultural but rooted in God’s eternal purposes—from Genesis to Revelation—and that only God’s grace can sustain purity, joy, and covenant faithfulness.
Now Abraham was old, well advanced in years, and the Lord had blessed Abraham in all the things. And Abraham said to his servant, the oldest of his household, who had charge over all that he had, put your hand under my thigh, that I might make you swear by the Lord, the God of heaven and the God of earth, that you will not take a wife for my son from the daughters of the Canaanites, among whom I dwell, but will go to my country and to my kindred and take a wife for my son Isaac. The servant said to him, perhaps the woman may not be willing to follow me to this land. Must I then take your son back to the land from which you came? And Abraham said to him, see to it that you do not take my son back there. The Lord, the God of heaven, who took me from my father's house and from the land of my kindred and who spoke to me and swore to me to your offspring I will give this land he will send his angel before you and you shall take a wife for my son from there but if the woman is not willing to follow you then you are free from this oath of mine only you must not take my son back there So the servant put his hand under the thigh of Abraham his master and swore to him concerning this matter. Then the servant took ten of his master's camels and departed, and taking all sorts of gifts from his master, and he arose and went to Mesopotamia, to the city of Nohor, and he made the camels kneel down outside the city by the well of water at the time of evening, the time when women go out to draw water. And he said, Lord God of my master Abraham, please grant me success today and show your steadfast love to my master Abraham. Behold, I standing by the spring of water and the daughters of the men of the city are coming out to draw water. Let the young woman to whom I say, please let down your jar that I may drink and who shall say, drink. and I will water your camels, let her be the one whom you have appointed for your servant Isaac. By this I shall know that you have shown steadfast love to my master.' Before he had finished speaking, behold, Rebecca, who was born to Bethuel, the son of Milka, the wife of Nahor, Abraham's brother, came out with her water jar on her shoulder. The young woman was very attractive in appearance, a maiden no man had known. And she went down to the spring and filled her jar and then came up. Then the servant ran to meet her and said, please give me a little water to drink from the jar. And she said, drink, my lord. And she quickly let down her jar upon her hand and gave him a drink. And when she had finished giving him a drink, she said, I will draw water for your camels also. until they have finished drinking. So she quickly emptied her jar into the trough and ran again to the well to draw water and she drew for all his camels. The man gazed at her in silence to learn whether the Lord had prospered his journey or not. And when the camels had finished drinking, the man took a gold ring weighing half a shekel and two bracelets for her arms weighing ten gold shekels. And he said, Please tell me whose daughter you are. Is there room at your father's house for us to spend the night? And she said to him, I am the daughter of Betul, the son of Milka, whom she bore to Nahor. She added, We have plenty of both straw and fodder and room to spend the night. The man bowed his head and worshipped the Lord and said, Blessed be the Lord, the God of my master Abraham, who has not forsaken his steadfast love and his faithfulness toward my master. as for me, the Lord has led me all the way to the house of my master's kinsmen. Then the young woman ran and told her mother's household about these things. I'll now summarise the next 20 verses for you. At this stage, Rebecca's brother, a layman came and found Abraham's servant at the well and said, yeah, come on back to the house, come on back. And the servant told layman and the household how he'd got there and what had happened at the well. And then we'll pick up the story again in verse 50. Then Laban... And Bethurl answered and said, the thing has come from the Lord. We cannot speak to you bad or good. Behold, Rebecca is before you. Take her and go and let her be the wife of your master's son, as the Lord has spoken. When Abraham's servant heard these words, he bowed himself to the earth before the Lord. And the servant brought out jewellery of silver and gold and garments and gave them to Rebecca. He also gave her brother and her mother costly ornaments. And he and the men who were with him ate and drank and they spent the night there. And when they rose in the morning, he said, send me away to my master. It was skipped down to verse 61 to 67. Then Rebecca and her young women rose and rode on the camels and followed the man. Thus the servant took Rebecca and went his way. Now Isaac had returned from Beel-a-Holroy and was dwelling in the Negev. And Isaac went out to meditate in the field toward evening. And he lifted up his eyes and saw and behold there were camels coming. And Rebekah lifted up her eyes and when she saw Isaac she dismounted from the camel and said to the servant, who is that man walking in the field to meet us? And the servant said that it is my master. So she took her veil and covered herself. And the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done. Then Isaac brought her into the tent of Sarah his mother and took Rebecca and she became his wife and he loved her. So Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. Father we thank you for Derek and for the message that we bring. We ask that you will speak through him clearly, give him clear words, clear thoughts, Father, and help us to listen to what your word tells us. And through Derek this morning, we pray this in your sage's precious name. Amen. Thank you for having me back. em We'll see how we go if I get asked back again after today, but that's okay. I just wanted to bring one little advert. You would have seen the things up on the screen about the South West Queensland Christian Convention coming up in Dolby. I just want to encourage you that that is a really good convention to go to and we have a top-note speaker this year from America, Jared Wilson, and we really look forward to what he's got to say. So if you've got a chance to go for the whole weekend or even just for one or two sessions, take up whatever you can. It'll be a really great time. We are coming to the topic of Genesis 24 and I'm going to be speaking about marriage this morning, which is really what the passage is about. And it's good for me to come and say the things that I can say because I can be a guest speaker, just speak and then leave. uh I'm going to say five points. and I'm going to try and keep it as short as I can. So, point one is this. Why should we be very careful and deliberate as we prepare for marriage? Point two is, what is it that makes marriage unique? Point three is, what's the difference between marriage and sin? That's a strange one. 4. What makes marriage glorious? 5. What can deal with the guilt of our failures so that we may live in joy and purity in marriage? We live in a world which has a different view of relationships than the Christian view. So it is good for us to talk honestly about a Christian view on marriage. Because it is not something that we naturally know. It is not something that we are ever going to hear on TV or the internet or anything else, I think. We must be very deliberate to talk about this issue. So point one is this, why should we be very careful and deliberate as we prepare for marriage? You see, as you read the story of Genesis 24, you find something you can't miss. Abraham, as a father, went to very great lengths to find a bride for his son. Like, when we say very great lengths, I mean 1500 Ks on Camelback to get the right woman. Not just, well, we'll have a look on Tinder or something, is that a thing? I'm sorry, yeah. Or something like that. She had to come from his home country. had said that to Abraham, his own tribe. And he got his trusted servant and he gave very exact commands. This is the one you should find. This is the one you should look for. Get it right. And they went through this thing, put your hand under my thigh. It's some sort of oath thing. It's a bit kind of confronting, but it's like... Promise me that you will do exactly what I said. Now we live in a culture actually where mostly when people get married it's kind of the boy and the girl making decisions and that's how it goes. There's not so much family involvement but there was a deep involvement here. A father, Abraham, who loved his son so much that he actually wanted to get the right woman. And actually, Rebecca's family were very involved too. There's little doubt that these families had the best interest of both Isaac and Rebecca at heart, which can actually be helpful. I don't know if you've ever seen those relationships where a young man or a young woman kind of go, well, mum and dad don't think it's right, and all my friends don't think it's right, and the church don't think it's right, but I actually think it's right. They could even say, God's told me. And you've seen the wash up of that sometimes too. And the pain that flows from it. Now in a minute I'm going to talk about the uniqueness and the glory and the purity of marriage, the heart of what marriage is. So I'm going about this the wrong way around. But I want to say this, because as grandparents, some of you are grandparents here, as parents, I don't know how many of you are single people looking to get married, but as those two, we should be teaching our young people about this. from when they're young actually, from when they're kids. How are you to be careful and deliberate in looking towards marriage? Now Jodie and I had the chance, oh sorry, I just want to say this, there's a lot at stake here, because realistically with the way things are now, when I do lots of marriages, I seem to end up with that blessing. And I say to people, know, Get this right, because you're probably going to be with this person for the next 60 years. This is not like I bought a Holden and then realised it was loaded of junk. This is the next 60 years because you can just sell that and buy a Ford and it'll be good. this is, aside from following Jesus, this is the biggest decision you'll make in your life. um We had a chance to speak at a young adults group in uh Mundubra late last year, I think, and we spoke about this and I just gave them a few points. Hey, because a lot of singles there, what should you think about when you're looking for someone to marry? I mean, deliberate, careful. And number one is the person a Christian. Because you see, if that person is You know you say, Jesus is the most important thing in my life and then you're marrying someone who doesn't even like him? That can be an issue, it? For the next 60 years. Jesus is most important. Now I'm not talking about a church attender. I'm not talking about someone who says, well I'll support you in your decisions. I don't mean someone who's spiritual. I mean someone who actually knows Jesus, who knows the truth of the Gospel. Somebody serious about their faith, that knows Him as Saviour. It is very important, not just a legalist, someone who knows God's laws and is very harsh. Because you actually get married to a legalist, they're always looking down on you because they think they're perfect and they've got it all together. Do they love Jesus more than they love themselves and their dreams and their aspirations? Are they more alive to him than they are to you? It's a big question. It is a vital question. It's worth asking somebody else about. Because we had actually a young lady come to us recently and said, you know this guy, you know his Christianity and you know, should I marry him? And Chadi and I just said quietly, run! um And she listened. Smart thing to do sometimes. Number two, when you're looking for someone, they a Christian? Number one. Number two, are they a friend? Do you actually like them? That's pretty important. Yeah. Are they, you know, someone you enjoy being around? Or don't think, oh well, they've got some bad habits but I'll change them. Anybody who's been married for a long time knows how easy it is to change your spouse. Yeah. They're supposed to smile politely there and realise that you can't. And they don't change that much at all. But you see, Marriage actually, I know we say as Christians sometimes, marriage is the ultimate relationship, but I actually think kind of friendship is. You know that Abraham was called a friend of God, and Moses was called a friend of God, and Jesus said, you know, greater love has no man than this, he lays down his life for his friends. Because let's be honest, if you're married to someone you're not a friend with, it's going to be pretty miserable. Best to marry a good friend. You know what I'm saying? someone you like. Point two. Friendship's crucial within marriage. Now this next one might seem like Australian and you'll go, why is he talking about this? And this is because we're Christians. Do you know that Christians have got views on submission and authority? Wives submit to your husbands, that sort of thing. Do know that there's a fair bit of diversity in the Christian world about what this actually means? I'm not going to give you what I think it needs to be. I'm going to tell you this, have that discussion. Because we've had young men say things to us like, when I get married my wife is going to be out, she can turn in her car licence, she doesn't need to drive anymore. Yep, she'll be just home having children. Now, I'm not saying that's right or wrong. I'm just saying this, have that discussion beforehand. If this is what you believe, just nut out what you're actually believing by it. Because you can see that will cause problems. That's just three little things. One other thing we often say is this. Just ask the person how many kids they want, because if you want none and they want four, you need to find someone else. Okay. I've taken a little bit of a tangent, but just on this, but see, they were very careful and deliberate about finding the right wife for Isaac. It is crucial for our joy in our lives. that we do the same when we think about marriage and we should teach our children about this and our grandchildren for their peace and joy. It's also worth noticing in Genesis 24 how much they sought God. If you read it right through, there's times where they pray and ask for guidance and worship about finding the right one. They were careful and deliberate in seeking God on this matter. And also, God answered. He supplied. He listened. So, God has made marriage the basis for family life in this world, so it is a God-honouring approach to approach marriage carefully. To look about this. That's my first point. Point two. What is it that makes marriage unique? Isn't marriage just basically what the world does except for we put a bit of a Christian spin on things? Is that right? Or is there something absolutely unique about the way God has made marriage? Marriage, the Bible says, is a covenant. Right. A covenant is a relationship based on vows, on promises. Even in the church, it's common for people to say, well, if two people living together, sleeping together, they're kind of married in God's eyes anyway. It's no different really, it's de facto which means like. It's like marriage. We don't need a piece of paper to be married, people say. It's a piece of paper? What's of paper? uh Do we know that marriage is actually God's design? It is a covenant where a man and a woman make covenant, promises and vows to each other. Now covenant vows and promises are not like the way that you might enter another relationship. Covenant vows and promises start with I, well I said something like this to Jodie, I take you. to be my wife. For richer, for poorer. In other words, if you've got heaps of money, if you've got no money. In sickness and in health, if you're sick, actually if you become a quadriplegic, I will love you. I will take you. It is not as the world has relationships which are contractual or transactional as they say. In other words, I will take you providing you make the grade, providing you come up to the standard, providing I'll give to you as long as you're given to me. Right? That's what you do when you make a deal, when you buy a farm or something. You know what I mean? But this is not that. It is not... I'll hold up my end of the bargain if you hold up yours. That's not a covenant. What a covenant is this. I promise here, before God and the gathered people, there there is witnesses that I will love you whatever. When you're when you're poor, when you have a nervous breakdown, when you get dementia or unemployed or just generally smelly and scabby. I will bind myself to you until death. not based on your behaviour, not based on your performance level. You see, actually, Christian marriage is nothing like what this world knows. Because you just jump in and out of relationships without that covenant promise. It's actually a lot like, and I know that recently you would have done Genesis chapter 15, where Abraham goes through the thing and he lays out the halves of the animals and that's how they made agreements, covenants in those days, and they made binding promises. But you see, in that chapter, what we find is that only God made unconditional promises. He said, I will do this. I will do that. It's really a good thing if you're going to read about God's covenant, read the New Covenant in Ezekiel 36, home and have read of that. And where it says this New Covenant I'm making with you and just read when it says God says, I will, I will do this, I will do that, I will do that. That's what makes a covenant, you see. God doesn't say, I will love you providing you come up to a certain standard. Otherwise, guess what? None of us are Christians. None of us have made the grade. Do you know that? Don't feel uncomfortable with a Christian through Jesus Christ and what he's done for us. You get what I'm saying? It is not God saying, if you come up to the standard then I'll love you. It is him saying things like, I have loved you with an everlasting love. You know how long everlasting is? Or, never will I leave you, never will I forsake you. How's that for a promise? And even the covenant with Moses, which we call the law, the Ten Commandments, what you find there, if you read the Ten Commandments, is firstly, God didn't give his commandments and say, obey these commandments and you'll be my people. In Exodus chapter 19, he says, you are my people, I've called you out of Egypt, I've brought you out through the Red Sea, I brought you out on eagle's wings, you are mine. Now here's my law. This is how you live as my people, not... obey my law and you'll be my people, my people are given my law. Because you see, God's people always failed His commandments, as we all have. We've all fallen short of the glory of God, but what did we find in Jesus? It says, see, at just the right time when we're still powerless, Christ died for all the good people. Oh, sorry, what's it say? When we were still powerless, Christ died for the ungodly, the people who haven't got it together, sinners, not people who think they've got it together like the Pharisees were. But God demonstrates His own love for us in this, while we were still sinners, not when we'd started to get ourselves together, while we're still sinners, Christ died for us. That's God's covenant with His people and marriage reflects that covenant. Covenant promises. Binding not what you expect the other person to do, but binding yourself to your own promises. That's what makes marriage absolutely unique. It also makes it high, way above what this world thinks relationships are about. It is awesome, beautiful, wonderful. based on God's promises. It is unique in this world because it's based on who God is. It's not just some cultural idea the church dreamed up as a good way to do relationships. It is based on God Himself. Which brings this next strange question, point three, what's the difference between marriage and sin? What? Marriage versus sin? I've heard people say, you know, people who hate Jesus hate marriage, and people who hate marriage hate Jesus. They kind of go together. That's very kind of divisive, isn't it? Like they're just so far apart. I want to tell you this, Western culture, that's what we live in. It's view on marriage is poles apart, it is opposite, it is nothing like God's view of marriage. It is actually a sin. mean, Western culture for a start, and I don't mind talking about this because hey, everywhere else we get it, relationships in Western culture is all about sex. That's the great idol, isn't it? Sexual pleasure. People are... absolutely obsessed with it. They are addicted to every form of sexual evil and at its heart pleasure is everything. It is crucial. It's actually the centre of marriage, what with the point without it. And so it goes to the point where even now We define ourselves, even as Christians, in terms of our sexuality, which is really weird. I will say, I am a heterosexual, actually I don't say things like that. What does that mean? Someone who's attracted the people of the opposite sex. It's like, no I'm not, I'm attracted to Jodie. Not people of the opposite sex, because actually that would be adultery in my thoughts, wouldn't it? Do you understand what I'm... no, maybe you... Understand this, in the Christian world, right, with regard to sexuality and sexual acts, there is marriage, which is good and pure and wonderful as God designed it, and then there's sin. Everything else of sexuality outside of marriage is sin. There's lots of different forms that takes, but it's pretty black and white. It's not like there's, well, you know, there's sex in marriage and sex out of marriage and they're almost the same. the same thing's happening, isn't it? No, no, no. We live in a world which actually thinks probably marriage is boring. where sex out of marriage is like the great god. It is everything. And uh pornography is seen as normal and acceptable and an objectification of women. That's just normal. and lust and debauchery and all that sort of stuff. That is just part of life and kind of as Christians, well we're a bit different than that. No, we are actually not. It is not like marriage. Marriage stands as a pillar. It is high because it is God's design for people and it is holy and it is wonderful. And as Christians, we... it's thrown at us all the time our heads become spaghetti. We become mixed up, we get sucked in to stuff which is not. And we actually start saying things like, as people say, well you know these my desires, that's just who I am, that's how I'm wired. Yeah? And you see what we do is we take lust and we say this is human sexuality as it's designed. um Hebrews 13.4 says, marriage should be honoured by all and the marriage bed kept pure for God will judge the adulterer and all the sexually immoral. You see, what we can think is, I uh have these desires and therefore if I get married I'll fulfill all those desires. I'm not realizing this right? I don't know if you know me, you don't know me very well but that's okay. Understand I am a man at war because I have living in me the Holy Spirit who is pure and just and right and beautiful and I have living in me what I would call the sinful nature, the flesh as the Bible calls it and they are at war all the time but the Holy Spirit He does not say, oh, you know, your sinful desires, they're not so bad. Right? They're alright. No, no, no, they are always wrong. And I can't drag my sexual uh evil into my marriage and say, it's Jodie's job to fulfil all that. Her job is to be my wife. And to live in the purity of marriage and the joy of all that that marriage bed entails. We've got to actually own up some time what I'm saying is this and say, actually, you know what, a fair bit of my views about sexuality and my desires are actually from the pit. They're not from God. They're not something that he has to make holy. They're actually wrong. You understand? And stop justifying evil. These things aren't marriage. Marriage is beautiful and perfect. And God did not give us marriage to satisfy our lust and evil. They are not marriage. So we need to repent, but we will never repent of anything until we own up and say, actually, you know what? It's not the world that's wrong, it's me. I'm a sinner. And what I do grieves. the holy God. Jesus had to die for these things on the cross. Do notice in Genesis 24 when Rebecca sees Isaac for the first time? And she's just trekked all that way and she covers herself with a veil? She actually has some sort of modesty and holiness. She could have said, I've just trekked 1500 Ks, let's go on a date. We need to do some tuning, is that the word? Try before we buy. See if we're compatible, that sort of stuff, yeah. No, she actually was honourable until she was married. You know what that means, she was a strong woman, not a pushover. That's good, isn't it? If you're young men, you want strong women. Okay, it also reminds us of... couple of really interesting things. You see the effort it took for them to bring the wife to Isaac. It actually reminds me of something that happened in Genesis 2, where Adam was all alone and God prepared a wife for him, Eve, and he brought her to him. That's why actually we do this thing in a wedding where the father of the bride comes, gives away. No, I don't think he owned her, it's not giving away. Okay, gives away the bride. Actually, he brings her, blesses her for that marriage. And God did it with Adam and Eve, he brought the wife. He did it here. And that reminds us of something really, really big. And this is where I want to talk about the glory of marriage, right? And this is really big, because you see, what it is, is there is a profound mystery of what God is doing through all of history, which is about marriage. It is not like marriage is a bit of a tack on, a few laws around it, and the marriage is actually central to all of God's schemes for all of history. Now I'm picking this passage, there's a lot in Ephesians 5, but I just want to show you something from it, which is... not where people normally go with it, but Ephesians 5 22 it says, Wives submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord. So you submit to the Lord first. And then he goes on and says, now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything. You see, the church and Christ, wives and husbands. Then he says, husbands love your wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her. That's how much you gotta love them, husbands. Love your wives as much as Christ loved the Church. made a holy blessing her by the washing with water through the word and to present her to himself as a radiant Church without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. So, it's actually... is this talking about husbands and wives? Or is it talking about Christ and the Church? What it is, is this. Human marriage... is a dim reflection of a beautiful and wonderful end marriage between Christ and the Church. It is part of all of God's plans. So Paul says this then, this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be United to his wife and the two will become one flesh. He's quoting from Genesis 2 and he says this, this is a profound mystery but I am talking about Christ and the Church. He said, don't get mixed up and think I'm telling you how to do marriage. I'm telling you about Christ and the Church. The perfect marriage and all human marriage reflects that marriage. Husbands love your wives as Christ loved the Church. Wives submit to your husbands as Christ submitted and the Church submits to him. that's mum just I'm busy. What he's saying is this, marriage is the source, that this end marriage between Christ and the Church is the source of our understanding of human marriage, it's not the other way around. And God's purposes for human marriage are based on the way he is doing things through all the time and human marriages are to reflect the relationship of Christ and his beloved bride, the Church. and that through all of history, God is actually preparing a bride for his son. The Bible starts with the marriage, right? Do you know what ends with the marriage? In Revelation 19? Yeah? In end, right at the end in Genesis, I'll read it in a minute, Revelation 19, but it speaks of a marriage of the Lamb, Jesus, and us, the Church, his beloved, the bride, who he died for, saved, washed and cleansed. And do you know just out of interest what colour dress she's wearing? A white one. In Genesis 19. We'll see that in a minute. Why? Because of her purity. you go, have a look at the church people, very pure. Absolutely pure. By the righteousness of Christ, washed and cleansed and perfected. There is nothing impure in the church. Because He has made pure by His death on the cross. He has taken away all of our sins. And so then it speaks of a marriage feast which begins. The whole story is going to end with a marriage feast. And actually marriage feasts are about the most lavish you can get in our society, is that right? You don't get bigger ones than that. Good, should be that way. Because they reflect something far greater, the great feast. Now I don't know if you've ever heard of a bloke called Jonathan Edwards. But he spoke like this. He was a theologian and pastor back in the 1700s, I think. And this takes the form of question and answer. He says, this is the question, what is the one great design that God has in view in all his works and dispensations? In other words, what is the one great work that God is doing for every age and everything he's doing? You know what his answer is? It is... to present to his son a spouse in perfect glory from amongst sinful, miserable mankind, blessing all that comply with his will in this matter and destroying all his enemies that oppose it, and so to communicate and glorify himself through Jesus Christ. God's plan, through all of history, is to make a perfect bride. From what? Well, sinners, like us. through every age to finish with a wonderful, glorious marriage. That's mind-boggling when you think about it, isn't it? It's not just, you know, marriage is an institution and who wants to be institutionalised, as uh Groucho Marx said, it is far more than that. Marriage is at the centre of God Himself. It is wonderful. It is glorious. And so in Revelation 19 verse 6 it says, then I heard what sounded like a great multitude, like the roar of rushing waters and like loud peals of thunder. Something big's about to be said. Hallelujah! For our Lord God Almighty reigns. Let us rejoice and be glad and give Him glory for the wedding of the Lamb has come. And His bride has made herself ready. Fine linen, bright and clean. was given to her to wear. Fine linen, it says, stands for the righteous acts of God's holy people. He gives her white robes, His righteousness. And then the angel said to me, write this, blessed are those who are invited to the wedding supper of the Lamb. And he added, these are the true words of God. We're heading towards a marriage. It's gonna be a big one. And human marriage, is a dim reflection of that final wedding day. And by the way, you've all been given an invite, so don't be stupid. Sign up, put your faith in Jesus, and you'll be there. Okay, point five is how do we deal with the guilt of our failures and live as God called us to live? This is the last point. If I talk about marriage in this high way, if I talk about purity, we all immediately know the truth of ourselves. Who's got it together? Who's got it right in their life? Who's got it right for an hour of their lives? We are sinners to the core. And we also know this, you know, sexual evil, actually, doesn't just, it's kind of like, you know, sometimes we do things and they don't affect us that much, but this affects our hearts, it affects us deeply. We have deep regrets for our failures. We have not just guilt, we have shame, where we go, I hate myself. I hate what I've done. I hate what I thought. I have this despising of sin. And we ask this question, can a rusted out old Christian like me or you actually be made new? Can we be washed white? And we have these promises from God and he says this, How can this be? Well this comes to us through what Jesus has done. We have guilt, we have shame, that's just a fact. But Jesus had none of that. He was holy and perfect. He never once disobeyed God. He lived in absolute purity in every aspect of his life. He obeyed the whole law of God. He alone is the image of God. He alone is the pure image of God. And he willingly went to the cross where he took our impurity, our taintedness, where he took our scarlet. where he took our darkened hearts, where he took our evil lusts. He actually bore that, in other words, he became that for us. And he burned under the wrath of his father in our place. Now, you know, this is really good because if you think, and I do, I have this shame, I have this guilt, Am I ever going to be free from it? There's only one way of knowing that we can be free from it and that's knowing that Jesus took it all and He alone makes us pure. So if you think I'm going to actually what I should do with you now is eight steps to become pure people and you know what you're going to fail at all of them. You cannot change yourself and you cannot purify yourself. No one's capable. We had a we heard about a seminar last year Yeah, I won't give too much information in case a person's here or something, I don't know. And they were talking about addictions. And this bloke who was sort of in his, around 70, said, know, we can get over our pornography addiction. We can do it. Get our minds to it. Get our hearts to it. Make systems. Have you? No. No. But I can. He's 70. Right? It's had 50 years of having to go. When are we going to actually give up and say, we cannot purify ourselves? All we can do is trust in Jesus, the only one who can purify us and forgive every sin and take away our guilt and even restore us from our shame. Where we can go, yeah, that's sin, but He has made me whole. He has made me new. He has completely restored me. Through Jesus and through Jesus alone. There is no other way to deal with this stuff. We need Him. And He not only purifies us, but He gives us the ability to go on in purity. He gives us the strength to actually, firstly, love Him in purity. And then, to live in marriage purely. He restores our love. Hurt described like this, right? This is a way of thinking about it. You know, if you had a roll of sticky tape, and you take sticky tape off, you can see I've got my bit in my hand, and I go down here on the carpet, and I put the sticky tape down and I peel it up, and I put it over there and I peel it up, and I put it over there and I peel it, I do it a few times, you know? Do know what happens? It loses its stickiness. Doesn't it? And sometimes we think, I've lost my stickiness because of the sin that I've done. I'm no longer warm towards others and warm towards God because... Actually, you know what? You haven't lost your stickiness. That's the thing. It's just been covered with impurities, with fluff and dirt and dead flies and stuff like that. Yeah? But what the cross does is that it actually takes away those impurities so that we actually have the ability to stick again. To stick in marriage. To truly love another person. To stick to God. we can actually be made new, not just as a once-of-one-would-become-a-Christian, but He goes on sanctifying us and purifying us and giving us our sticky back as we look to Jesus. And He's the only one who can fix us. I'll it again. You were saved, right? You were made pure by Jesus. You go from faith to faith. Go on living by faith. because He alone can keep you pure. Keep looking to that cross, keep looking to the place where He has taken away your guilt, restored you, taken away your shame and He has made you as white as snow. Because as you look to Him and that purity that He's given you, you can leave your lust behind. Instead of trying to control it, or trying to work it out somehow in marriage or something, you can actually leave it all behind and be set free from it. You can. Through the cross. And the cross alone. So, one last little tiny point. At the end of a wedding service, there's something really wonderful that we usually gloss over. It happens right at the end. You have all the action and the vows and everything, and then there's a prayer, and at the end of the prayer, then there is a blessing. A blessing on the couple. That's the important bit. That God does the work for this couple. It's his blessing of saying, God, you do. Why do we need to say you do? Because this couple can't. They need your blessing. They need your strength for every part of their life. They need you to do what they can't. It is God who holds us together. That's why if you're having trouble in your marriage, don't try fixing your marriage. Look at God. He's the one who can fix things. He is the one who can repair things. Look to Him first because by His Holy Spirit, He actually gives us the power and the ability to even desire and to fulfil our covenant vows. Bible puts it like this. In 1 Thessalonians 5, there's all these commands. Do this, do that, do this, do that, do this. And then it says, Faithful is he who calls, that's God who calls us. for he will also do it. In other words, it is by him that you will be able to fulfil the commands of God. It is by him you'll be able live in pure relationships and pure marriage. It is by his spirit and his spirit alone and you need him. We all do. I would really encourage you if what we've said today is, I don't know, something you really want to work through, talk about it with someone else, pray about it, talk to Matt, Michelle, I don't know, anybody who's a Christian, because this is really important. It's at the centre of our lives. I'm going to pray. Father, we are conscious that we have fallen short of Your glory. We have not lived the way that you have called us to live. We have been sucked in by the works of the evil one, by the pleasures of this world and the lust that it preaches to us. We've been drawn in to ways that we know are not your ways. We have fallen short of your glory. Father, I pray that you would bring the strong conviction of sin by your Holy Spirit upon us, that we would be so broken that we would say we have nowhere to go yet again but to Jesus. Father, give us faith in him that we might trust in him again and look again to his wonderful work on the cross. Father, we need you and we need your spirit at work in us. I pray that you would bring your conviction of sin and righteousness and judgment to us today and in the days to come for our good and for your glory. And I pray this in Jesus' Amen.