Forgiveness
Matthew 18 verses 21 and 35, to 35. Then Peter came up and said to him, Lord, how many times shall my brother sin against me and I still forgive him? Up to seven times? Jesus said to him, I do not say to you up to seven times, but up to 77 times. For this reason, the kingdom of heaven is like a king who wanted to settle accounts with his slaves. And when he had begun to settle them, one who owed him 10,000 talents was brought to him. But since he did not have the means to repay, his master commanded that he be sold along with his wife and children and all that he had and repayments be made. So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before him saying, have patience with me and I will repay you everything. And the master of that slave felt compassion, and he released him and forgave him the debt. But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii. And he seized him and begun to choke him, saying, pay back what you owe. So his fellow slave fell to the ground and began to plead with him, saying, have patience with me and I will repay you. But he was unwilling and went and threw him in prison until he would pay back what was owed. So when his fellow slaves saw what had happened, they were deeply grieved and came and reported to their master all that had happened. Then summoning him, his master said to him, you wicked slave, I forgave you that debt because you pleaded with me. Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave in the same way that I had mercy on you? And his master, moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he would repay all that was owed him. My heavenly Father will also do the same to you if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart. Hey, Dan's going to come and share the word with us now. So, Dan, I'd just like to pray with you, mate, if that's alright. Dear God, we just thank you for this man. We thank you Lord for the heart that you've given him. We thank you Lord that he has a heart for you and Lord that just wants to serve you. I just pray now Lord that your Holy Spirit will just take a hold of him, that your Holy Spirit will just speak through him Father and just give him the words to share for each one of us. Touch all our hearts we pray from your word this morning. Amen. Thanks Lord. Hello everybody. oh So now on our journey through the parables, we've come now to this parable where Jesus spoke with his disciples about forgiveness. Thank you Norm for what you shared with us already this morning. um It really does lay a really good foundation about uh what I've got to bring here this morning. This notion of forgiveness, um it really is something that we all struggle with. Sometimes... Sorry, yeah, so some of us have been carrying around this feeling of envy or bitterness and a refusal to forgive for quite some time. I tried to find a little bit of info. found, so I've come across a survey out of America. I couldn't find one for Australians, but I think Americans are people like us, so we'll go with what the Americans, this FETSA Institute called a survey of love and forgiveness. And um in this survey they discovered that 58 % of Americans agree that there are instances where people should never be forgiven. 58 % agree that there are certain things or instances, crimes committed, where people should never be forgiven. Then another one called the Barna research or the Barna group, which usually gives values and polls about what Christians do and believe. And the Barna Research noted that one in four practicing Christians struggle to forgive someone. Out of about thousand people polled, they discovered that 23 % have a person in their life that they say they just can't forgive. The head researcher who put this poll together noted that forgiveness is essential to Christianity. It's what distinguishes it from any other religious faith. If Christians struggle to extend forgiveness, not only do their relationships suffer, but the church's witness is marred." End quote. So we need to know that forgiveness is not just... elective in God's curriculum. It's a required subject. Jesus keeps bringing up this topic of forgiveness in his entire earthly ministry. If we look at the Gospels, peppered throughout all his teachings is the subject of forgiveness. The Sermon on the Mount, blessed are the merciful. He taught on the Sermon on the Mount the disciples to pray, forgive us our debts as we forgive our debtors. When he was asked what the most important law or most important commandment is, his answer implies forgiveness. He said, love God with all your heart, with all your mind, with all your strength. And love your neighbour as yourself. Then he told his disciples to bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you and pray for those who persecute you. And some other examples. Can anyone tell me what the scripture verse is on the sign out the front? Ephesians 4 32. Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ has also forgiven you. And in Colossians, so as those who have been chosen of God, holy and beloved, put on a heart of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience, bearing with one another and forgiving each other. whoever has a complaint against anyone. Just as the Lord forgave you, so also should you. Then here in our parable in Matthew 18, he tells them this parable. It's a story about forgiveness. So evidently, forgiveness is a big deal to Jesus because he keeps bringing it up. And it's important enough that when he teaches it, his disciples to pray, he includes this phrase about forgiveness. in Matthew 6 14. For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions. So why is it so important? Because not only does it set Christians apart from every other religious system, but if you don't find a way to deal with your past, your future is going to suffer. It's hard to go forward if you don't make a choice about your past. You can't change your past, it's done. You can choose to forgive. And that will alter everything in your future. Now says in verse 21 that Peter comes up to him and said, Lord, how often shall my brother sin against me and I forgive him? Up to seven times. I want to give us four facts about forgiveness. The four Ds, if you like, about forgiveness. Number one, forgiveness is difficult. So we've already established that a lot of people hold grudges. One in four find it hard to forgive. So when Peter asks this question, notice what Jesus says in verse 22. Jesus said, do not say to you up to seven times, but up to seventy times seven. So Peter's just heard Jesus say that if your brother sins against you, go to him, tell him his fault. If he listens to you, you've gained a brother. Evidently that really moves something in Peter because... That's all he can think about. So when he has an open audience with Jesus, he wants to bring this up. Maybe he's dealing with something going on with the other disciples. Maybe he's mad at James and John for saying that they want to ah sit on Jesus' right hand and left hand in the kingdom. You remember that none of the disciples like that. Something's gotten Peter's It's got his attention enough to bring this idea of forgiveness to Jesus. So what this tells me is that forgiveness was hard for Peter and I think what we need to understand is forgiveness was hard for Peter because forgiveness is hard for everyone. And why is it hard? It's hard because it involves confronting painful emotions. as Norm mentioned earlier, his story. Maybe someone's betrayed you, maybe someone's abused you, maybe someone's lied to you, maybe someone's gossiping about you, and the list will go on and on. And another reason it's harder, because it feels like if you forgive, you are letting go of your right to see justice done. I don't want to forgive him. What about accountability? That person should never be able to do that again. He has to be held accountable. And another reason forgiveness is hard is because you are risking getting hurt all over again. So it's better, you think, to develop a tough skin over your heart. I'm just going to repel those who try and get close to me. So you think, is it true? Is it better to live that way? It's not. In his book called The Four Loves, C.S. Lewis writes this, To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will certainly be rung and possibly be broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact, you must give your heart to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully around with hobbies and little luxuries. Avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. The only place outside of heaven where you can be perfectly safe for all the dangers of love is hell. So, does forgiveness have a limit? That's what Peter wants to know. How many times, he says, there has to be a limit. So, in verse 21, Peter suggests a number. Seven times? Up to seven times? I can almost imagine that as Peter was asking this, that he thought Jesus would commend him. Because we have to understand that back then, the going rate for forgiveness was three times. That's what the rabbis taught. Three strikes and you're out. I'll forgive three times and then you're done. So Peter doubles it and then he adds a little bit extra just to be sure. One rabbi named Yossi ben Hanina wrote, he who begs forgiveness from his neighbour must not do so more than three times. That's what people believed. Another rabbi, Yossi ben Yehuda, said, if a man commits an offence once they forgive him. If he commits an offence a second time, they forgive him. If he commits an offence a third time, they forgive him. But if he commits an offence a fourth time, they do not forgive him. So, Peter thought that Jesus would be impressed. Instead, Jesus said, no, I don't say to you up to seven times, but up to 70 times seven. What Jesus is really saying here is stop counting. He's not giving them a limit. Other translations say 70 times 7 or 77 times. 1 Corinthians 13 says that love keeps no record of wrongs. You see, if we forgive that many times, it's because we've stopped counting. On another occasion, Jesus tells his disciples in Luke 17, If your brother sins against you, rebuke him. And if he repents, forgive him. Now what does he say next? Even if he sins against you seven times in a day and returns to you seven times saying, I repent, you shall forgive him. And the apostles said, Lord, increase our faith. I think I'll be saying that too. Man, that's a pretty high standard. I don't have enough faith for that. That's hard. And that's the point. Forgiveness is hard. That's the first fact, that forgiveness is difficult. That's why we need help. The second fact, forgiveness is divine. Back to verse 23. For this reason, the kingdom of heaven may be compared to a king who wished to settle accounts with his slaves. When he had begun to settle them, one who owed him ten thousand talents was brought to him. But since he did not have the means to repay, his law commanded him to be sold along with his wife and children and all that he had, and repayment to be made. So the slave fell to the ground and prostrated himself before him, saying, Have patience with me, and I will repay you everything. And the lord of that slave felt compassion and released him and forgave him the debt. But that slave went out and found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred denarii, and he seized him and began to choke him, saying, Pay back what you owe. Now it's pretty easy, I've read through that passage many times, most of us probably have and haven't really grasped. There's some numbers getting thrown around here. So let's just have a quick look at this. So it says that the king forgives him how much? There's 10,000 talents. That represents an unpayable debt. It's a huge, almost uncountable number. The word... What is used here in the original language is myrioi, which is where we get the word myriads. He owed him myriads, which is a lot of money. So this guy owes his master 10,000 talons. The whole region of Galilee, with all its towns, the total annual revenue was about 300 talons. So one talent is worth about 20 years wage. So to put it in today's terms, just to go a little bit, Elon Musk, he owed him like $60 billion. So what does he do? He throws himself completely at the King's mercy. He admits his guilt. He offers no excuse. He offers no defence. But he does say that he'll repay him everything. Okay, so you owe $60 billion. How do you reckon you're gonna repay that? So this guy who's been forgiven this unpayable debt, he is, as Jesus described in the Sermon of the Mount, poor in spirit. Blessed are the poor in spirit. I'm broke. I'm poverty-stricken before you spiritually. then Jesus says, blessed are those who mourn. He's doing that. He's mourning. He's begging. He's like that tax collector in Luke 18 who beat his chest and said, God, be merciful to me, the sinner. And he was forgiven. So this enormous incalculable debt represents our debt of what? Our debt of sin before God. There's a hymn, an old hymn that goes, I had a debt I could not pay. He paid the debt he did not owe. I needed someone to wash my sins away. Martin Luther said, we are all beggars before God and we cannot hope to pay. And just like Norm mentioned during communion, the first words that came out of Jesus' mouth when he was hanging on the cross, Father forgive them for they do not know what they're doing. And why were those the first words he spoke? Again, do you think they would have been yours? Father, forgive them. They were his first words because that is mankind's greatest need, to be forgiven. Forgiveness is divine. And the king extends forgiveness to his servant who could not pay the sixty billion dollar debt. We all know the Lord's Prayer, right? Our Father who is in heaven, hallowed be your name. Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our debts. He's referring where he says, us our debts. This is obviously our debt with God. It's not our debt with other people. The fact that Jesus taught them to pray that, and it's a prayer that's been prayed over the world for the last 2000 years, tells us that we need regular forgiveness. And I say that because there's... Probably some who will say that, I don't need to pray that. I don't need to pray, forgive my debts, because I'm already a Christian. I'm a new creation. Old things have passed away, new things, all things become new. That is true. But we still have a sin nature. And we still sin every day. When we know we've done it, we should keep a short account of it. We need to keep our accounts with God short. In 1 John it says, we say that we have no sin, we are deceiving ourselves and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. Do you remember when Jesus was with his disciples at the Last Supper in John 13? It says that he got up from supper, he laid his outer garments aside, This is the only thing I'm taking off. He wraps it around himself and then what did he do? He poured water, I haven't got any water or a bowl, but he poured water into a basin and he began washing the disciples' feet. and they felt a bit uncomfortable. They would have been looking around at each other and going, what's this guy doing? They didn't like the fact that their Lord was doing this. So he's going around washing the disciples' feet. Then he gets to Peter and Peter was like, Lord, you're washing my feet? And Jesus said to him, Peter, you don't realize what I'm doing right now, but later on you will. But he didn't stop. said, you'll never wash my feet. And Jesus said, well, mate, I'm paraphrasing, if I don't wash you, then you have no place with me. And Peter goes all in and he says, well, wash my hands and my head and everything. And Jesus replies, he who has already had a bath needs only to wash his feet, otherwise he is completely clean. You see, when you come to Christ, you are completely clean. But you get up in the morning, you walk around life, you go through the world and we get dirty feet. and they need to be cleaned regularly. So if we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, but if we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and forgives us our sins. And that is one of the divine prerogatives to forgive. We need to be reconciled to our Father. So two facts about forgiveness. It's difficult and it's divine. Third fact, forgiveness is demanded. Act verse 28. But that slave went out and he found one of his fellow slaves who owed him a hundred dinarai. And he seized him. He began to choke him saying, pay back what you owe. So his fellow slave fell to the ground and began to plead with him saying, have patience with me and I'll repay you. But he was unwilling and went and threw him in prison until he should pay back what was owned. So when his fellow slaves saw what happened, they were deeply grieved and came and reported to their Lord all that had happened. Then summoning him, his Lord said to him, you wicked slave, I forgave you all that debt because you pleaded with me. Should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave in the same way that I had mercy on you? And his Lord moved with anger, handed him over to the torturers until he should repay all that was owed him. And if that's not bad enough, what does the last verse say? My heavenly Father will also do the same to you if each of you does not forgive his brother from your heart. So first of all, this is just unbelievable. To think that this servant who owed this massive debt, so large he'd never in a million lifetimes repay, turns around to one of his servants and demands that he repays what he owes. A mere pittance in comparison. 100 denaro. I'm led to believe that about one denarii was equivalent to about a day's wage. So, 100 days' wages. In today's terms, let's just say that the minimum wage around $25 an hour. So, around $2,500. So, he's owed around $2,500, but he's just been forgiven about $60 billion. Would you consider that acceptable behaviour? No, it really is unimaginable that we would refuse to forgive. That's the point of the story. It is unimaginable that a follower of Jesus Christ would refuse to forgive anyone after he or she has been forgiven so much. So there's two points we need to realise. Firstly, refusal to forgive is hypocritical. And the second, refusal to forgive invites torment. Forgiveness received should translate to forgiveness extended. But it doesn't always happen that way, does it? Sounds good on paper, but in life, if you've been around long enough... you know that it's not always the case. Can I have another quick look at the Lord's Prayer? says that Jesus, during the sermon on the mount, prayed. He said, then pray this way, our Father, who is in heaven, hallowed be your name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this day our daily bread and forgive us our debts as we also have forgiven our debtors. And do not lead us into temptation, but deliver us from evil. For yours is the kingdom, and the power, and the glory, forever. Do you pray this way? Do you know anyone that prays this way? Father forgive me as I forgive those who sin against me. How many would rather God forgive you better than you do other people? Jesus knew that the hardest part of this prayer is this forgiveness. So he expands at the end here as we looked at earlier in verse 14. For if you forgive others for their transgressions, your heavenly Father will also forgive you. But if you do not forgive others, then your Father will not forgive your transgressions. There's not meant to be any moping around over it first, any sulking. There's not, I'll give them the silent treatment first. No testing them to see if they're really sorry and deserve your forgiveness. Just forgive. Forgive. So in light of what we've read here in chapter 6 and the parable we've been looking at in chapter 18, Jesus is not saying that you get saved by forgiving people. He's not saying that. What he is saying is those who are saved will be forgiving people. If we are saved, we need to be the most forgiving people in our workplaces. Our willingness to forgive others and not hold grudges will stand out to those that we interact with every day. So the first point was refusing to forgive is hypocritical. And the second one, refusing to forgive invites torment. Back to verse 34 in our parable. That's a word that means to suffer great pain. Please note that he doesn't say that he'll be turned over to the executioners, but to the torturers. You're not going to lose your salvation over this, but you will lose your peace. God will turn you over to that lack of peace, that torturing emotion. The Bible says that God disciplines those He loves. One writer said, Christian who harbours grudges or bitter feelings towards one another will be turned over to torturous thoughts, feelings of misery and agonising unrest within him. So every time you see that person, the feeling comes back. Whoever that person may be, a parent, an in-law, a close friend, someone that we work with, If you haven't dealt with it right, all those feelings of resentment or pain start churning up and you're handed over to the torturers every time. The application here is very clear. God is King. He's King in this story. all of the servants he has lavishly forgiven their debt. If you refuse to forgive others, you are a hypocrite and you will experience torment." That's what it says. Ephesians 4, 32, be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you. Forgiveness is demanded. And fourth and final point, forgiveness is doable. You'd have to agree with me that Jesus would never tell us to do anything unless he gave us the power to do it. 33, should you not also have had mercy on your fellow slave in the same way that I had mercy on you? Forgiveness is a choice. How do we go about it? like Norm mentioned earlier and should be the first thing we do is we begin praying for that person. May pray for that person that's offended you or that you are offended with. If you put a person like that on our prayer list, eventually you're just not going to be holding on to that stuff. All those feelings of bitterness and anger will slowly disappear. Well, what do we pray for? We don't pray that they'll choke on their Vegemite sandwich. or the plane will crash into their house or they get run over by a car on their way to work. Sometimes. Yep. You pray that God will bless that person. Jesus said, do to others as you will have them do to you. Ask God to help you love them as he loves you. He has forgiven us more times than we can count. As far as the East is from the West, so far has He removed our transgressions from us. After praying for them, here's another thought. Imagine what it's like being on the other side of you. Or me. What's it like living on the other side of you? How do others perceive you? How you communicate? How you say things? how you look at people, your body language. Forgiveness is a choice. The choice is you release that person of any obligation or you choose not to. If not, it sounds like this. You owe me. I'm going to make you pay. You're going to regret ever saying that to me. I'm going to recruit others to my cause against you. That's one choice. The other choice, the choice of forgiveness, sounds like this. You don't owe me. I don't want revenge. I'm going to let this go. I'm going to make a choice to forgive you. The third tip, and probably the hardest, you see it's not just good enough just to simply pray about it, but at some point, sooner or later, you're going to have to confront it. You're have to go to that person and try and resolve it. This is what Jesus said in Matthew 5. Therefore, if you are presenting your offering at the altar and there remember that your brother has something against you, leave your offering there before the altar and go. First be reconciled to your brother and then come and present your offering. Now might be wrong, but I believe this is the only time in Scripture where Jesus says to interrupt worship to get that right. This process may take some time. There are times when the other person might just not want to talk about it. Just remember that if they never want to let you in, they never want to resolve it, you are only responsible for you and not them. If you have done what the scripture commanded, you can leave it before God. When it comes to forgiveness, debtors should never become collectors. We are all debtors before God. Jesus was so quick to forgive on the cross. I came across this quote from Amy Carmichael. If I say, yes, I forgive you, but I could never forget as though the God who twice a day washes all the sands on all the shores of all the world could not wash such memories from my mind, then I know nothing of Calvary love. If this is a burden that you've been carrying, it's a choice you can make right now. A choice to just let it go and be healed. I remember years ago when I was in school, I was... um Year 8, just started high school and consistently bullied by some year 12 boy, some older boy. And it was a physical abuse and emotional abuse but he just did it because he could. And, As we've been talking about holding, you know, that feeling of uh resentment towards that person. For years I had that feeling of unrest. I wasn't at peace with it for years. em Never did see that guy again. But after praying about it, um it's amazing how quickly God takes that feeling away. I just thought I'd share that. We've all got a story. We've all got a story. If you and I have been forgiven, then we need to be forgiving. As Christians we have no right to refuse to forgive. And if you are an unbeliever, your first prayer should be, Forgive me God, cleanse me of my sin. going to ask the Musos if they want to come back up and I'll just close in a word of prayer. Let's just pray. Father, we thank you for what Jesus did on the cross. We thank you for the blood of Jesus which cleanses us from all sin. We thank you for your willingness to take care of and remove our debt, one that we could never pay. Help us to find that kind of love and forgiveness that you command of us. Make a change in our heart Lord. Help us to take things to you in prayer. Help us to deal with them the right way. But we just commit these things to you now in Jesus' name, Amen.